The university of life

Feedback to the function of snot

FROM: Unknown

SUBJECT: The Function of Snot


I just can't believe that evolution brought us to the point where the ideal male/sperm donor is a nose picking, snot eating smart nerd!!!

if you ask me something went REALLY wrong somewhere

and by the way Oh Great One! any ideas on why nose picking in public is no more considered a plus these days?? considering it's evolutionary value in picking your mate...seems such a waste to evolve such a great system and then chuck it out the window. .a lot easier process compared to the modern dating services



Dear Student of the University of Life,

We understand your frustration with these rather provocative theories on the function of snot. We can believe that you find it hard to believe. However, science does not judge the merit of a theory by how believable it is. It is judged based on an objective assessment of supportive data and logic. Unfortunately the human brain is not made with logic in mind.

You also ask why nose picking in public is not considered a plus anymore. The answer to that question is relatively simple. The nose picking was a sexual selective drive during the early stages of human evolution. During the more advanced stages most specimens were perfectly capable of picking noses with either right or left hand. Hence it had lost its selective value. However, we can still see the power of the nose picking instinct in humans all around us. The temptation to do it can be overwhelming.

Although there have been no recent studies on this problem we propose that during later stages of human evolution it became more important to mate with specimens that were capable of rational thought, self control, and image building (as a prelude to the evolution of politicians). At this point it became important to NOT to pick your nose. It is not clear if the evolution of the politician marked the end of the species or the beginning of a new era.


Professor at the UOL

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